Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Mogette, Brexit, Exeunt



MOGETTE, BREXIT, EXEUNT: VIVE L'EUROPE!

Prologue


Mogette, La Deux-Chevaux coquette
A Citroën car you see
Rolled from the Paris factory gates
In nineteen se’nty-three

Act I: A prep school in England, 1973…

MCMLXX one one one
Wrote little David Camer-on
With silver spoon and fountain pen
He did his Latin prep again…

…When, at the tender age of six
His kindly Magistra
Said “Cameron, when in a fix
Just think of  PANDOR-A”

Young Boris, at his own prep school
Looked through his tousled fringe
Slid out his five- inch wooden rule
And spit-balled Algie Hinge

“Johnson, boy, don’t clown around
The Latin master roared
You’ll conjugate IAMAQUO
Like “Mitto”, on the board

IAMAQUIS, IAMAQUIT
Wrote Boris on the slate
“Keep going then, you little tit”
Did mouthe his spit-balled mate…

Now Nigel F, the little tyke
Learned Latin too, with gusto
But mainly liked a verbal fight
With Smithers, Fark or Busto

And in that Anno Domini
Mogette, all fresh and new
Would bounce around the Vendée vines
A happy CV-Two

For in that Janu-ary,
Was a true red letter day
The Common bloomin’ Market
Was joined by the UK…

With Slade, Sweet, Dawn and Donny
The future now looked fitter
With Status Quo and 10cc
 EU and… Gary Glitter

And Mogette’s FUTURE owner he
Was sweet sixteen in Staffs
Tank Top and Noddy Holder’s shoes
Thought Europe wasn’t naff…


Act II  Windsor, England, circa 1977…


The Eton years, top hats and tails
The Wall Game, Alma Mater
And Dave would be PM one day
As Bojo thought “me later”

Then Oxford, Bullers Club for them
Three thou at the outfitters
With pig-heads and with privilege
They’re happy little critters

While Nige, in Dulwich, blustered forth
A taste for beer and jokes
Was soon acquired; then a place
A broker in The Smoke…



INTERLUDE

Mogette’s paintwork faded more:
French sunshine and clean living
While Maggie, back in eighty-four
Droned “Money? No more giving!”

So Thatcher claimed some money back
And Europe schemed and fixed
Accommodated Les Anglais
And tried no end of tricks

The years fly by, and at the end
Of the Millennium
Mogette finds a new owner-friend
Twas Noddy Holder’s chum

Fast forward, MMXV-eye
And June the twenty-third
Mogette awakes, and learns the news
It’s BREXIT, have they heard?

Act III   Somewhere in Europe, Third day of Summer 2016

And there they are, B, N and D
The first two sphincters smiling
A three-ring circus this must be
A prospect most beguiling…

Tis Kippers and Pandora’s box
A trashing of Good Will
With poker and pecunium
They’re Bullingdon-ers still…

They’ve preyed on fears of foreigners
They’ve promised jam, and borders
Jerusalem, your country back
And booting out those hordes…

Of lazy Poles, of clueless Lats
Of scroungers, scamps and scoundrels
“A Golden Age awaits us, That’s…

[…Er, “the way to save lots of money
And stuff?
And get me the PM’s job?”…
And create a vile smell of xenophobia for a bit...?
Thanks Boris; rubbish rhyme.]

An over-privileged buffoon
Twas Bojo’s chance to SHOUT
And crap inside the nest, the loon
Now who bails UK out?

FLASHBACK

Boris remembers Latin prep
And old IAMAQUO
He contemplates, then conjugates
All ready then, let’s go

IAMAQUO IAMAQUIS
IAMAQUIT, now hunt
IAMAQUIMUS, Er, QUITIS
Er, Er,

IAMAQUNT !

Act IV  Sainte-Cécile, Western France. This morning.

Mogette, discrète comme d’habitude
Shrugs, says to her mate Noddy
“The moral of this interlude
I’ll tell you, it’s quite shoddy…

For now you are not XVI
It’s L and X, be brave!
That’s sixty, not sixteen, time flies
So here’s a word I’ve made:

It’s called “Dummocracy” old pal
The formula’s quite reckless
You ask a simple question, Al
To all folk, bright or feckless…

And some will think quite long and hard
And some won’t think too much
And treat it like a Lottery card
Or X-Factor, and such…

So now we’ll have to Wait and See
And we shall see it through
Blockbuster in Se’nty-Three?

“They Haven’t Got a Clue…”

The Bully boys, red faces now
The EU on its knees
And UKIP’s finest MEP
Shouts louder : quelle surprise…

And JC’s party bickers on
And does that rather well
Tis Gilbert and ‘tis Sulli-van
The burlesque show from hell

Epilogue et Mores

So Mogette gets a wash today
Her paintwork fresh once more
She poses for a photograph
Then offers this Bon Mot:

“The easy choice is polarize,
To let the rich get richer
But ‘tis “ensemble” we must ride
And think of our kids’ future…

Liberté: a great idea
A word, on which to dwell
But don’t forget Egalité,
Fraternité as well…

The lesson here is GET INVOLVED
And always VOTE, dear friends
Abstention serves the Dummagogues
The Kippers, the FN’s

Tis not through mistrust, or through hate
That we will write new stories
MARCHONS ENSEMBLE, tis not too late
To dump those effing…

(in the interests of political neutrality, Mogette suggests that  the reader may insert the name of any political party here).

AB 27 VI 2016

Sculpture masks "Gorgones Taxus et Baccata" courtesy Dominique COUSSEAU, Ami de Mogette et Sculpteur.

FINALE MUSICALE: They didn't have a clue what to do, either: 














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